For a movie about an 7 foot tall metal-skinned werewolf bringin’ a ruckus…there
sure is a lot of talking going on. The film starts out well enough with
some CIA dudes on a mission in Hungary to collect werewolf blood. The
first guy distracts the monster by placing his neck in the werewolf’s gaping
mouth full of nasty, big, pointy teeth while the other CIA dude shoots the
creature with silver bullets. There’s no indication if he hits the wolfman
in the nards or not, but I like to believe so. Once back stateside, some
scientists at a Top-Secret facility try to use the werewolf blood to make a
super soldier. Good news is they succeed! Bad news is this mother
woke up grumpy as fuck (Grrrrr.) and immediately starts killing the wookalar
piss out of everybody. It’s mildly entertaining in a low-budget,
early 1990’s horror movie kind of way.
I could probably toss in some Barry Bostwick ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW jokes or
make some lame quips about a "metal" werewolf who is really into metal music,
but I'm not feeling it. The movie is mildly interesting in an nostalgic
way for older viewers and that's about it. The "metalbeast" looks cool,
but isn't on screen enough. The rest of the characters are forgettable and
boring. The dialogue is nothing. It just sounds like "burrr,
buuurrrr, burrrrr..." after awhile. Zero nudity, very little blood, zero
gore, dumb ending, boring direction. Watch it if you want, but don't
blame me if you fall asleep.
