Wednesday, July 6, 2011

THE BLOB (1988)

Following the basic story from the boring original, the remake has better acting from a good cast, better special effects, Shawnee Smith in a cheerleader outfit, Kevin Dillon strutting, Shawnee Smith in a cheerleader outfit, a smart script, Bill Moseley appearance, Shawnee Smith in a cheerleader outfit and most importantly: it's a lot of fun.

After a highly entertaining introduction to the main players, an object from outer space crashes down in a field near a hobo's shack. The hobo goes to investigate and ends up with blob goo wrapped around his hand. Some local teenagers take him to a hospital and that's when all Hell breaks loose. Before you can say "Hockey season ended months ago." the blob has grown bigger than Rosie O'Donnell's skull and starts killing everybody in town. Not to worry though, because Kevin Dillon and his trusty motorcycle are here to save the day...except for the few dozen people who get killed by the blob including some really awesome kills like a dude pulled down a sink drain and that prostitute from "Magnum P.I." getting crushed inside a phone booth.

Everything that was awesome about 50's creature feature movies is in this movie and then amplified with pure 80's cheese. It's a blast! The only thing that could have made it better (besides a bigger boss fight at the end) is if it'd been set in a college town and the blob invades a party where a bunch of hot naked chicks are running around topless. Highly recommended.

Original - The Blob (1958)
Sequel to original - Beware! The Blob (1972)

Monday, July 4, 2011

SALEM'S LOT (1979)

Can evil dwell in a house and even call other evil-minded individuals to come live in it and do naughty things? Well, the townsfolk of Jerusalem's Lot are about to find out because the creepy old Marsten House has some new occupants. The house has been abandoned for years, but the last owner was a mass-murdering asshole who eventually killed his own wife and then hung himself.  The new owner is even worse: he's a goddamn shit-sucking vampire...wait til mom finds out!  (Yes, that was a LOST BOYS reference.)

At the same time, a writer, who grew up in 'Salem's Lot and even had a bad experience at the Marsten House as a child, has returned to write a book about the house. He meets an old teacher and starts romancing a young lady, but his courtin' days are cut short when numerous locals start turning up dead and their corpses disappearing.

Enjoyable (for a 1970's TV movie) adaptation of Stephen King's excellent novel, but it's not all that great. The biggest problem is the main vampire dude just doesn't have enough screen time and I could never get over the made-for-TV feel of the movie. The whole thing came off as cheap and watered-down. Still this version is definitely watchable with a truly impressive cast, but the ending is pretty lame...especially that tacked on horseshit in Mexico.

It was really cool seeing Elisha Cook Jr and Marie Windsor in the same movie again. I just wish they had more scenes together.

Part 2 - A Return to Salem's Lot (1987)

Friday, July 1, 2011

LE SAUVAGE (1975)

Catherine Deneuve is bullied into promising to marry a local gangster, Vittorio. She's very unhappy, so a few days before the wedding she runs away, but doesn't make it far before Vittorio is hot on her trail. After some exciting and funny misadventures she ends up on a deserted island with Yves Montand. He rents the island, has a really nice set up going and doesn't want any company, but he has it anyway because Catherine refuses to leave! They have a small war, but soon enough romantic sparks begin to fly. I was pleasantly surprised to see how natural their romance grew. It wasn't forced like you see in a lot of romantic comedies. I was also surprised, more like shocked, to see Tony Roberts with a substantial role in this film and speaking French!

When I first put this movie in I thought it was going to be a deserted island drama, but instead it's an light-hearted comedy and a good one at that. I found myself laughing a number of times and will definitely be watching it again. It also didn't hurt that the tan Catherine is beautiful and runs around in warm weather clothing and even gets topless! Yves turns in a perfect performance, Catherine is beautiful and funny and the script was very well written and kept my attention the entire time. When it was over I found myself wishing it had been longer!

[SPOILERS!!!] At the end, I wish that instead of returning to his childhood home, Catherine instead had rebuild the house that got burned down on the island. I think that would have been more romantic.[SPOILERS!!!]